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Forum President Acceptance Speech

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__sneaky__ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote __sneaky__ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 6:32pm
I sir, have no real experience in anything that could be useful. Therefor, I believe I am qualified to be Vice President.
"I AM a crossdresser." -Reb Cpl


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Tolgak View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tolgak Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 6:38pm
I'd like to be Commander of the Tippmann Air Force, head distribution agent of pro-ministry literature and history, and coordinator of festivities for Wacky Tacky Tie Day.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 7:23pm
Originally posted by Eville Eville wrote:

Originally posted by Mack Mack wrote:

Originally posted by Eville Eville wrote:

This is what happens when we try to rush a vote through.  We don't have time to do proper background checks. What is you experience as a warmonger?


I believe we should not only declare war on every opponent we can easily demolish but we should taunt them afterwards with stuff like "yoooouuuu don't haaaave an arrrmmmmyyy, becaaaauuuse we traaaaashed it" once we are done.

Furthermore I think we should secretly instigate conflicts between small nations that aren't worth our time and sell the news footage on pay-per-view.

Wow, now I need someone to set up the second part. Want a job?


I would be honored to lend my expertise to the good of the people.


The job is yours.

Originally posted by Magoo Magoo wrote:

Ooooh! Ooooh! Can I be that one guy!? PUH-LEEEEZE!


I'm sorry, Eville asked first.  You can be "Head Minister of Tinkering With Things That Go BOOM!" if you want.

Originally posted by __sneaky__ __sneaky__ wrote:

I sir, have no real experience in anything that could be useful. Therefor, I believe I am qualified to be Vice President.


I think you communicate way to clearly for the job and and probably disqualified yourself by being voted "most improved."  However, I will give you a chance Mr VP.  I do expect you to live up to your forum Nom de Plume in all aspects of your political career.

Originally posted by Tolgak Tolgak wrote:

I'd like to be Commander of the Tippmann Air Force, head distribution agent of pro-ministry literature and history, and coordinator of festivities for Wacky Tacky Tie Day.


Sky Marshall Tolgak it is.  Consider the other duties as an integral part of the job and get me a cool presidential ride.


Edited by Mack - 03 June 2010 at 7:23pm
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__sneaky__ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote __sneaky__ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 7:43pm
Hells yes! LOL
"I AM a crossdresser." -Reb Cpl


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oldpbnoob View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote oldpbnoob Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 7:49pm
I nominate Scotchy for forum drunk and Johnny Hopper for Court Jester. I'll throw my hat in for forum VP since I add little to the forums and often times have no clue what I am talking about. I also say things that are totally inappropriate on many occassions. I'll do my best to make you facepalm often for making me your second in command.

Edited by oldpbnoob - 03 June 2010 at 7:49pm
"When I grow up I want to marry a rich man and live in a condor next to the beach" -- My 7yr old daughter.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote usafpilot07 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 8:29pm
Originally posted by Tolgak Tolgak wrote:

head distribution agent of pro-ministry literature and history,


As a Turk, he'd be exceptionally qualified for this.
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Eville View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Eville Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 9:18pm
Originally posted by usafpilot07 usafpilot07 wrote:

Originally posted by Tolgak Tolgak wrote:

head distribution agent of pro-ministry literature and history,


As a Turk, he'd be exceptionally qualified for this.

OH SNAP!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ParielIsBack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 June 2010 at 10:05pm
I'm trying to consider my marketable skills.

For irony's sake, we could make me the Presidential Chef (we'll all die in a week).  Alternatively, I can be the token black guy.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mbro Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 1:13am
Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

I nominate Scotchy for forum drunk
I challenge this nomination. I may not speak in strange slang but I will give scotchy a run for his money any day.

Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 2:50am
Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

I'll throw my hat in for forum VP since I add little to the forums and often times have no clue what I am talking about. I also say things that are totally inappropriate on many occassions. I'll do my best to make you facepalm often for making me your second in command.


While this is an outstanding resume' the position has, unfortunately, been filled.  However, I am still looking for a chief of immigration and the job is yours as long as you have no qualms about enforcing a strict "no mimes" policy.

Originally posted by ParielIsBack ParielIsBack wrote:

I'm trying to consider my marketable skills.

This is government; marketable skills are not required.

For irony's sake, we could make me the Presidential Chef (we'll all die in a week).

I prefer not to die within the week; I have magazine subscriptions that would go to waste if that happened.

Alternatively, I can be the token black guy.

We don't need one of those.  However, I am looking for a token "future target of fratricide" and hear you are qualified.


Originally posted by mbro mbro wrote:

Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

I nominate Scotchy for forum drunk
I challenge this nomination. I may not speak in strange slang but I will give scotchy a run for his money any day.


I do believe a drink-off is called for.  The minister of instigation needs to take care of setting it up.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote StormyKnight Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 3:19am
Originally posted by SSOK SSOK wrote:

I am willing to accept any positions I am nominated for.
Mr. President, if it pleases the court, I'd like to nominate SSOK for 'doggystyle'.  As far as rumor goes, he is eminently qualified.  If it turns out he isn't, it will be a splendid opportunity for him to learn, if it pleases the court.
 
I would also like to take the opportunity to nominate myself for the Secretary of Sarcasm and Cynicism.  If this has already been filled I'll take a job in the Department of Conjecture, Rumor and Speculation.
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote oldpbnoob Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 10:17am
Originally posted by Mack Mack wrote:

Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

I'll throw my hat in for forum VP since I add little to the forums and often times have no clue what I am talking about. I also say things that are totally inappropriate on many occassions. I'll do my best to make you facepalm often for making me your second in command.


While this is an outstanding resume' the position has, unfortunately, been filled.  However, I am still looking for a chief of immigration and the job is yours as long as you have no qualms about enforcing a strict "no mimes" policy.
In typical forum fashion, as I did not get my way, I am going to decline your offer, take my ball and go home. So there Mr. Poopy Pants.
"When I grow up I want to marry a rich man and live in a condor next to the beach" -- My 7yr old daughter.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ceesman762 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 10:21am
"Being a Mime is punishable by death in the Tippmann Forum. Anyone found guilty of being a mime will flogged, drawn and quartered, then shot and then fed to rabid weasels."
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Benjichang Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 10:23am
I nominate Magoo/DeTrevni for Secretary of Hobbies and Diversions.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote scotchyscotch Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 11:04am
Originally posted by mbro mbro wrote:

Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

I nominate Scotchy for forum drunk
I challenge this nomination. I may not speak in strange slang but I will give scotchy a run for his money any day.


I accept this challenge. I was at a wedding last night so I'm drunk right now if it matters.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 11:38am
Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

Originally posted by Mack Mack wrote:

Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

I'll throw my hat in for forum VP since I add little to the forums and often times have no clue what I am talking about. I also say things that are totally inappropriate on many occassions. I'll do my best to make you facepalm often for making me your second in command.


While this is an outstanding resume' the position has, unfortunately, been filled.  However, I am still looking for a chief of immigration and the job is yours as long as you have no qualms about enforcing a strict "no mimes" policy.
In typical forum fashion, as I did not get my way, I am going to decline your offer, take my ball and go home. So there Mr. Poopy Pants.


Obviously, you are not a real forum member if this is how you take disagreement/disappointment.  The proper response is to call me names,* ignore my responses and argue against points I didn't actually make while supporting those arguments with links to sources that are either extremely biased or have nothing what-so-ever to do with the topic at hand.  It is also appropriate to stereotype me by accusing me of being a member of some group you disapprove of.  Since you did none of the above I can only assume that you have done away with the real oldpbnoob, who was an outstanding forumer, and are in actuality an impostor/infiltrator.  Your inability to think outside your invisible box and accept a job (for the good of the forum) other than the specific one you wanted leads me to suspect you are a mime and you will be dealt with accordingly.


*You did get that part right.


Edited by Mack - 04 June 2010 at 11:51am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote __sneaky__ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 11:50am
Detrevni should obviously be in charge of the money reserves.
"I AM a crossdresser." -Reb Cpl


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote oldpbnoob Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 11:52am
Originally posted by Mack Mack wrote:

Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

Originally posted by Mack Mack wrote:

Originally posted by oldpbnoob oldpbnoob wrote:

I'll throw my hat in for forum VP since I add little to the forums and often times have no clue what I am talking about. I also say things that are totally inappropriate on many occassions. I'll do my best to make you facepalm often for making me your second in command.


While this is an outstanding resume' the position has, unfortunately, been filled.  However, I am still looking for a chief of immigration and the job is yours as long as you have no qualms about enforcing a strict "no mimes" policy.
In typical forum fashion, as I did not get my way, I am going to decline your offer, take my ball and go home. So there Mr. Poopy Pants.


Obviously, you are not a real forum member if this is how you take disagreement/disappointment.  The proper response is to call me names,* ignore my responses and argue against points I didn't actually make while supporting those arguments with links to sources that are either extremely biased or have nothing what-so-ever to do with the topic at hand.  It is also appropriate to stereotype me by accusing me of being a member of some group you disapprove of.  Since you did none of the above I can only assume that you have done away with the real oldpbnoob who was an outstanding forumer and are in actuality an impostor/infiltrator.  Your inability to think outside your invisible box and accept a job (for the good of the forum) other than the specific one you wanted leads me toI suspect you are a mime and you will be dealt with accordingly.


*You did get that part right.
  See? You've fallen into my trap of showing you exactly how inept and incapable I am, thus proving once again my superior attributes for the position.
 
Also, since the time that I was a young boy that broke his arm playing Hacky Sack and had my arm healed miraculously by a Mime, I am incapable of discriminating against them. If you had been there, you would know the true love of Mimes and that they are the guiding force in our troubled world.
"When I grow up I want to marry a rich man and live in a condor next to the beach" -- My 7yr old daughter.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JohnnyHopper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 11:52am
Is there an opening for director of the Tropical Investigation of Tipsy Top-heavy Indigenous Entertainment Systems?


I'll also accept any position where I can share my special high intensity training....

Edited by JohnnyHopper - 04 June 2010 at 11:54am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 June 2010 at 11:53am
Originally posted by __sneaky__ __sneaky__ wrote:

Detrevni should obviously be in charge of the money reserves.


Good point.  Since he never responded to the previous offer, I will support my VP's suggestion:

DeTrevni/Magoo is the Minister of Finance.
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