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Blows my mind...

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FROG MAN View Drop Down
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    Posted: 03 December 2009 at 8:52pm
So a girl from the town I grew up in died last night in a car accident, it was a tragedy and she was only 16. I log on facebook today and see, about 30 people have there status' as "RIP" "omg I cant belive it" etc...

At first I thought it was pretty offensive, not sure why it just made me angry. Then I noticed someone had made a group called RIP <name> with 100s of people joining it...

what would posses someone to do this? what are your opinions? I think its crazy offensive and I would be pissed if I died and people made a facebook group about me.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DeTrevni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 8:55pm
Uh, they're honoring her death? Or respecting. Whatever, you know the verb I'm looking for. Why is it offensive?
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ammolord View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ammolord Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 8:57pm
They did this when Reiny & lexi (17 year old girls) were killed in rollovers 3 weeks ago (they were 2 days apart). I dont worry bout it, Its what us kids do. Their familes appreciated it, it showed that they had alot of people that cared for their daughers. We were even thanked at their funerals.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote scotchyscotch Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 8:57pm
Yeah it's like an obituary but better and relevant. 
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FROG MAN View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FROG MAN Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:05pm
Im surprised with your responces, I thought you guys would have agreed with me. I think facebook is just lazy and gossipy. in my opinion if you want to honor the person then do something. posting something on facebook and clicking a button means absolutly nothing.

When my best friend died, and me and and group of friends (3 or 4 very close) stayed with the family  every day for a week after, we got a plaque and mounted it at the top of our ski hill, I wrote a letter to his mom and made a photo album for her with hiking and skiing pictures. My other friend cleaned there house, and helped with grocery shopping etc..

Now I just giving an example, when he died going on facebook didnt even go into my mind. again seems lazy and gossipy. and if your not close enough to do anything for the family then you obvously wernt that close and just being gossipy.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote scotchyscotch Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:18pm
Yeah but people who want to pay there respects but aren't necessarily close to the deceased or the family would feel uncomfortable doing things like that. I can't see anything wrong with it. it's not the only thing the family has to remember them by. it's just people being given a chance to pay their respects.

I've seen a few and the family always appreciate it for what it is.
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FROG MAN View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FROG MAN Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:29pm
Ya, I guess to each his own. personally this kind of stuff I have always been sensitive to. I am just scared people are turning death into gossip. I remember when I was in highschool this girl died and everyone skipped class and sat in the gym talking about it. and the teachers didnt care because they thought the same thing, "oh its just people paying there respects and talking about there loss and looking for support", but to me it just felt like gossip and people using the death as a means of directing attention onto them selves. I ended up just walking home because I couldnt take it.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ammolord Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:29pm
Yeah, just kinda depends where you are at. Both chicks i knew used to hang out with us at dead end, so we all have memorial stickers on our cars. its just one of those things......
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tolgak Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:30pm
Lost a high-school acquaintance to cancer some time around thanksgiving. It's always weird to hear that kind of news.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DeTrevni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:31pm
Originally posted by FROG MAN FROG MAN wrote:

Im surprised with your responces, I thought you guys would have agreed with me. I think facebook is just lazy and gossipy. in my opinion if you want to honor the person then do something. posting something on facebook and clicking a button means absolutly nothing.

When my best friend died, and me and and group of friends (3 or 4 very close) stayed with the family  every day for a week after, we got a plaque and mounted it at the top of our ski hill, I wrote a letter to his mom and made a photo album for her with hiking and skiing pictures. My other friend cleaned there house, and helped with grocery shopping etc..

Now I just giving an example, when he died going on facebook didnt even go into my mind. again seems lazy and gossipy. and if your not close enough to do anything for the family then you obvously wernt that close and just being gossipy.


So because it was posted on Facebook automatically means that they didn't do anything else? How long would it take to post a quick FB "obituary?" Like 5 minutes?

It's more insulting that you accuse them of not caring than it is them posting the update on FB...
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FROG MAN View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FROG MAN Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:40pm
Ya i guess its bad I am accusing people. Its just I have had several close people to me die, and not once has going on facebook to let the masses know how much pain or sorrow i felt. A death to me is personal and should receive personal attention.

You guys have convinced me though that its really not that big of a deal, and I will try not to let it bother me as much. I just hope when I die people either remember me by the selves in there own way, or try to personally help the people who were close to me.


Edited by FROG MAN - 03 December 2009 at 9:41pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bravecoward Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:43pm
If there is anything to learn about death its that everyone deals with it differently
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Koolit32 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 9:44pm
Good way to keep everyone up on memorial information, etc.
Don't feel bad, one of my ex-drug using buddies overdosed and people were posting things like "you owe me money" on his wall.

Totally innocent, and all the friends aren't totally exclusive close friends that need to do their shopping.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote choopie911 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 10:12pm
I don't see ANYTHING wrong with that, and I've seen that many times on facebook. As previously stated its a nice way for those who werent AS close to pay their respects in some way. While you say clicking a button does nothing, that's not the point. They're thinking about them, and their memory, isn't that the point?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mbro Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 December 2009 at 11:04pm
Originally posted by FROG MAN FROG MAN wrote:

Im surprised with your responces, I thought you guys would have agreed with me. I think facebook is just lazy and gossipy. in my opinion if you want to honor the person then do something. posting something on facebook and clicking a button means absolutly nothing.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote RoboCop Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 December 2009 at 12:48am
Originally posted by choopie911 choopie911 wrote:

I don't see ANYTHING wrong with that, and I've seen that many times on facebook. As previously stated its a nice way for those who werent AS close to pay their respects in some way. While you say clicking a button does nothing, that's not the point. They're thinking about them, and their memory, isn't that the point?
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