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If you plan on having kids: Heed this warning!

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Reb Cpl View Drop Down
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    Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:17pm
As soon as you have your first child....move.

Seriously.

Move as far from both your family, and your in-laws as soon as humanly possible. You ask why?
because no matter how rational your family is, no matter how great your in-laws are, as soon as that kid comes into play, things change. Spend more than 15 minutes more a month visiting one set of grand parents, and the others get jealous.

Holidays? Forget it. Become shut-ins and visit no one. If they want to see you, they come visit. Jealousy and irritation becomes the order of the day. We're not even to Thanksgiving yet and I've got one set of parents pissed off at me because we're not having Thanksgiving with them- even though we were there last year and made it abundantly clear that we'd be doing this on a rotational basis.

Either don't have kids, or move.....move far, far away.




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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote oldpbnoob Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:20pm
Second word of advise, pick your spouse wisely. Divorce only makes it worse.
 
Growing up, it wasn't unusual to have at least three Thanksgivings and up to 4 Christmas' including Chritmas Eve at my mom's side of the family.
"When I grow up I want to marry a rich man and live in a condor next to the beach" -- My 7yr old daughter.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ParielIsBack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:23pm
Alternatively, have in-laws that live right down the street from your parents.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote RoboCop Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:24pm
Most of my life was of attending my mom's side of the family to celebrate 4th of July, Thanksgiving, Christmas,... but now I see my father's side and I hate having to go to another christmas. Sure it's nice to see the other family, but it seems like such a hassle, but I'm also lazy and have no clue who 3/4ths of the people are on my father's side.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Dazed Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:27pm
Or run yourself ragged like we do. We live within an hour of both sets of grandparents, and all four sets of great grandparents. We spend a lot of time on the road during the holidays. If there's a schedule conflict (which happens every Christmas now that one of the families moved their gathering on top of another a few years ago, and refuses to change away from that day/time), we go to the family that called first. We set up another time to go visit the left out grand/great grandparents.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Reb Cpl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:27pm
Originally posted by ParielIsBack ParielIsBack wrote:

Alternatively, have in-laws that live right down the street from your parents.


Not good enough.

You'll still spend 'x' amount of time at one family's place, and 'y' amount of time at the other......they WILL compare the times, and you WILL suffer for it.

Having them altogether for a holiday isn't a bad idea, if each side is really small- and you can avoid any conversation between mother. My mother and my mother in law smile at each other and exchange pleasantries, but there's some bad blood there, stemming back from a baby shower, which I don't want the details on.

Fathers, on the other hand....really just don't care about any of that.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Reb Cpl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:34pm
Originally posted by Dazed Dazed wrote:

Or run yourself ragged like we do. 


We did that before the baby was born. Thanksgiving day, Christmas Day, New Years day, Easter....we were on the road for every one of them. I refuse to do that now that the little guy is born. 1st, its annoying. 2nd, a 7 month old's schedule is tenuous at best.....hours on the road are a bad idea.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ParielIsBack Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:35pm
Frankly, my family hasn't experienced any of that.  My grandparents got on well when my mom's parents were still alive, and my parents and my brother-in-law's parents are as close to best friends as someone living eight hours away can be.

My parents should be retired by the time I'm married, so they'll probably just spend every weekend visiting all their children and grandtots anyway.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Dazed Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 3:53pm
Originally posted by Reb Cpl Reb Cpl wrote:

Originally posted by Dazed Dazed wrote:

Or run yourself ragged like we do. 
We did that before the baby was born. Thanksgiving day, Christmas Day, New Years day, Easter....we were on the road for every one of them. I refuse to do that now that the little guy is born. 1st, its annoying. 2nd, a 7 month old's schedule is tenuous at best.....hours on the road are a bad idea.

It's not as bad with a 7 month old as it is with a 2 year old. Just wait until he is too hyped up from the sweets and socialization to take a nap on the way home, so he crashes at 5 pm. There goes bed time...

We're going to try it with two for the first time this year. I have a feeling it'll be exponentially more difficult. Everything else is.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rednekk98 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:04pm
Don't worry Reb, eventually it will degenerate into a cycle of spite and alcoholism and your kid will end up like me.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote carl_the_sniper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:05pm
Pro Tip: Celebrate both Canadian and American thanksgiving.
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Time for a C-Section!

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ceesman762 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:31pm
Originally posted by rednekk98 rednekk98 wrote:

Don't worry Reb, eventually it will degenerate into a cycle of spite and alcoholism and your kid will end up like me.

We're related???
Innocence proves nothing
FUAC!!!!!


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SSOK Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:41pm

Host?

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Reb Cpl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:46pm
Originally posted by SSOK SSOK wrote:

Host?



Played that game once, its tough in an apartment. We were rather bluntly told "It doesn't feel like thanksgiving"


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Time for a C-Section!

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ceesman762 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:47pm
^^truth....feels more like a mosh pit....without music...
Innocence proves nothing
FUAC!!!!!


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tolgak Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:51pm

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Time for a C-Section!

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ceesman762 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:52pm
does not work on in laws...^
Innocence proves nothing
FUAC!!!!!


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tolgak Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:54pm
Originally posted by Ceesman762 Ceesman762 wrote:

does not work on in laws...^


For the kids, dummy.
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Time for a C-Section!

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ceesman762 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 4:56pm
HA!!!!!!  You have a lot to learn about children!!!  You need benedryl!!!!  tasers don't work on them! Especially cranky 2 year olds...
Innocence proves nothing
FUAC!!!!!


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote __sneaky__ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 November 2009 at 5:26pm
Originally posted by Tolgak Tolgak wrote:


Dang it! Beat me to it.
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