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Funniest Noob Stories thread

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Jaxss View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jaxss Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 August 2007 at 12:09am

This isnt a story but it bothers me when people says they were "never a noob" but no matter wat u say the word "noob" means your new to something like a video game, paintball, hockey, etc..., just had to get that off my chest. ;D



Edited by Jaxss - 26 August 2007 at 12:17am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mr.Jake Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2007 at 6:12pm
feel any better?
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote hybrid-sniper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 August 2007 at 6:24pm

Technically "newb" refers to a new player.

"Noob" refers to a player who thinks they know what's up, but really doesn't and ends up acting like an ass.



Edited by hybrid-sniper - 28 August 2007 at 6:32pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote rednekk98 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 August 2007 at 11:56am
I managed to attempt to shoot someone when I had a barrel plug in.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote reifidom Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 August 2007 at 12:40pm
I see that happen surprisingly often. I've done it before as well. It doesn't occur to many people that they've just greased the inside of their barrel with paint either. They play on.

Last year I was playing and just as the game was ending I was advancing along the side of the field and I found a gun on the ground. It was loaded, gassed up, and just sitting there. I picked it up and found a ref. The kid who'd rented it got hit, dropped it, and ran like hell.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote eric_thered Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 November 2007 at 12:01pm
one time i was paintballing ( it was my 3rd time) and i was hiding in the edge of a forest and there was about a 2 meter gap then a hill which i wanted to hide behind. so i ran to the hill and almost got hit then i dove behind the hill and landed right in a prickley bush. i jumped up and yelled " OWWW" and got smoked right on the back of the head with a paintball. turns out there was a guy on the other side of the hill laying down and when i jumped up he shot me. it hit me so hard it actually knocked me over
those who live by the sword, get shot by those who dont
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DeTrevni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 November 2007 at 1:38am

Hm. I thought I had posted in this thread all those months ago. I guess not.

SOOOooooOOO.....

 

 

 

 

 

Post.

Evil Elvis: "Detrevni is definally like a hillbilly hippy from hell"

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote tallen702 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 November 2007 at 1:48am
Here's a newb story for you. I've been playing this game so frikken long that they handed us .68 specials and brand new pro-ams at the field when we upgraded to semi from pump for $15 extra. Not to mention the fact that paint was $100/1000. I remember that Sears was the only place around that carried ANY equipment and they only sold paint pre-packaged in 10rnd tubes. I made 200 rounds in my hopper last ALL DAY I had about 50 left over and the field would "save" them for you until you came to play the next time. Needless to say, it's been a while since that first game. Oh, we also had real explosive paint grenades! Those were FUN!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote WeeMan23 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 November 2007 at 10:37pm

This isn't about me but; the first time I went paintballing, my friends and I were getting our gear together and there was a field right next to where we set up (with a net in-between of course).  I turned to watch a game that had just started and was able to see the break out.  This kid sprinted to about the 30 while shooting and didn't see the bunker he was running at.  He slammed into it at full speed and almost knocked it over.  The funny thing was that he lokked around to see if anyone saw him, then just stood up and acted like nothing had happened.  Watching him made me feel better about being a newb.  The only stupid thing I did that day was call for a paintcheck and take a step out of my bunker so the ref could see me.  Needless to say I got lit up pretty bad.  

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote jedi mike0 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 November 2007 at 4:27pm
The second time my sister ever played paintball, she was out in the staging area with her friend and I.  The particular field we were at used barrel plugs.  Both of them were fooling around so she pointed the gun at his face, shot from about 3 feet away, and the barrel plug came flying out and hit him right in the lip.  She hasn't done anything stupid like that since.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote thejudge Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 November 2007 at 5:05pm
I was playing with some friends in a backyard (thick woods) and his gf showed up.  She decided to play and of course they were on the same team.  She put on a bright red sweatshirt (in the woods mind you) and they started making out.  One of my teammates came up on them and shot them both and you just heard her scream.  It was funny.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DeTrevni Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 November 2007 at 6:11pm
Making out, huh. You people should really be wearing masks. Seriously...


Edited by DeTrevni - 15 November 2007 at 6:12pm
Evil Elvis: "Detrevni is definally like a hillbilly hippy from hell"

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote thejudge Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 November 2007 at 6:48pm
thats what I was thinking.  Not really sure why they would be stupid enough for that one.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SSOK Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 November 2007 at 1:53pm

Hmm...

Last week I was playing renegade for the first time in a year or two (and I remembered how much field play is better), and it was about 50* out and drizzly. I couldn't see crap with my thermals and a fan (eventually got to the point where I'd shoot at the moving blurs), so most people were taking off their masks because they couldnt see anything with beginner masks. None the less, one kid (who should have known better given his expierence) got hit right below his eye. If he had moved a half inch he would be blind.

And most people who have been playing for a long time still do the barrel plug thing.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote scrilla21 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 January 2008 at 8:33am

-ok It was our first time playin ever.Me and my friends were all put on one team and after a few minutes into the game all of us were eleminated....all but my boy B(the white guy in my sig)! He was the only on left and he thought he had the other team on the ropes cuz he thought he knew where the group was. little did he know that there was one guy that was coming around from the other side and he shot B in the A$$ point blank!! It was so funny be cause it happened right infront of the waiting area, so everybody busted out laghing!! Now his kick name is sgt. assshot!!

-There was onther one from that day were there was this lil boy,had to be around 8 or 9. The game had stARTED and I was leaning behind a tree waitin for the other team to come down.Then this lil guy wants to choose me as his buddy in the field! And here is the convo: 

8yr old:Do you see them?

me:Nah

8:You sure

me:yeah

8:Well when you see them let me know cuz I'm ready!! I'm ready to go!!I'm ready for them!!When you shoot Imma shoot!

So I laughed at how pumped he was to play but he could barely lift the gun! Not to metion all this talkin that he's doin is gonna give me away. So I told him to run to the next tree becuz we can't both fit behind the same tree,I would cover him. I told him to run and when he ran,I know I was wrong, But I didn't cover him. A few min. later I'm out and he's still playin. Karma!! But if he didn't leave my side I would've been gone much quicker!!  

 

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote thejudge Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 January 2008 at 5:39pm
We went to a field not too long ago and about 25-30 players showed up that had never played.  There were about 10-12 of us that had our own equipment so we decided to try a game of renters vs owners.  We set it up as attack and defend. First they had to defend this little base in the mid of the field and we attacked. (Now to the funny part)  We explained to them that when they were hit call out and walk off of the field with their hand raised or gun raised so they wouldnt get shot at.  Well it seems some of them didnt get that memo because as soon as they got out they would put their hand up, run, then drop their hands and hide behind something in fear of getting shot again.  by doing so everyone who had not shot them would fire again at them because they thought the poor kids were still in.  They remembered to keep their hands up after that.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ilford Rule Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 January 2008 at 5:53pm
That seems to happen a lot... new players freaking out when they get shot...

I've another story:
Playing at a woods field a few months ago, a few buddies and I were able to move up the entirety of the field along the tape running into one group of three opponents along the way. Once we got there, we found 12 (no joke, 12) first-timers all huddling together in the starting bunker. This is a 10+ acre field. In 20 minutes they hadn't moved out of the starting bunker. So my squad (and I) decide to swing around behind them and mercy them. We come around the corner (three of us, each wit our marker up and one of us with his pistol - I know, I know, pistol, but he insists on having one - in his second hand). What happens? All of them freeze with their hands up. Except one. In the confusion, he waits about 10 seconds, doesn't move, and after the third time of us yelling "MERCY MERCY MERCY", he decides to shoot. We didn't shoot back, as we knew they were first timers and didn't want to put them off... but the ref had a good time yelling at the kid.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote scrilla21 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 January 2008 at 7:50am

The last time I played there was this guy there showin everybody that he got shot in the balls and didn't feel it! Poor Guy in more ways than one!!!

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JAden Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 March 2008 at 8:50pm

i have a story about me but the story of "Revenge of the noob" has to be said

We (me and a friend) went to an indoor airball course. we played a couple games one some lost some. Then a kid with his dad (which neither of them had played before) walked on to the field with two 98c's. against them, from what i can remeber, a dm5, ion, and an angle. After seeing this i thought "here come the salughter. " the whislte blew the dad was taken out first. his son how looked like he needed a new change of  pants hid in the snake and sat there. a person from the other side ran to the 50 bunker turned his back to the kid. the kid fired and missed by a whole state. the opponent turned fired and missed on purpose. by now me and my friend in our heads are screaming "fire".  this happens about two more time until the opponent yells "we've won!". with those words the kids stands up and fires two shots get the opponent in the back of the head and square between the shoulders. Needless to say i was pleased as punch, and even let out a "Haza".

 

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LoneWolf019 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 March 2008 at 9:21am
My first time paintballing at Skirmish USA I was pumped. My neighbor had an extra set of woodland camoes that he gave me and I had my stock Tippmann 98 Custom. We were in the woods and They had me and a couple of other guys stay on the right border and come behind them and shoot them up. Well I went around the whole map at a decent jog and We shot out the whole team. The ref blows the whistle and the time is up. We go up to the dead zone found out we lost and I am wondering how we lost. Our team says some guys flanked us from behind and killed us all. I noticed our blue tape on our arms and the blue tape on our team mates arm and I kind of put 2 and 2 together. I dont think it gets much noob then that.
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